Many years ago, my late wife and I had the privilege of training new volunteers at our then local branch. Now, the Lord has led me to use that experience to facilitate a course on listening skills at my church. In preparation, I visited the Samaritans' website, and found the acronym S.H.U.S.H. being used in a campaign to encourage the public to become better listeners. The Samaritans are, deliberately, a non-religious organization so that they are available for everybody, but I will add some Bible verses.

Show that you care. Give undivided attention. Remove any distractions. "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves." (Philippians 2:3 NIV 2011)

Have patience. It may take time before a person is ready to open up. "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud." (1 Corinthians 13:4 NIV 2011)

Use open questions, those that need more than a yes/no answer. Focus on feelings rather than facts. Don't jump in with your own ideas. Use silence. "Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues." (Proverbs 10:19 NIV 2011)

Say it back to check that you have understood, but don't interrupt to offer a solution. "To answer before listening — that is folly and shame." (Proverbs 18:13 NIV 2011)

Have courage. Don't be put off by a negative response, and don't feel that you have to fill a silence. "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." (Philippians 4:6 NIV 2011)

We will need help from the Lord to put this into practice. Pray for discernment about the decision to really listen to the person rather than to have a two-way conversation, and for guidance to remember that this person is the expert on their own life and that the questions that we ask should guide them towards finding their own solutions.

A 19th century writer said it well:

Oh, the comfort — the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person — having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take them and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away. – Dinah Craik (1826-1887)

Prayer: O Lord, we thank You for Your greatest gift of love. Help us to take Your love and pass it to our neighbours by listening — really listening — to their troubles. Guide us as we listen, so that all that we do is an expression of Your love and so that Your will may be done. We ask this in Jesus' name. Amen.

After my wife's death, a friend of her mother telephoned to offer her condolences. Among other things, she told me about being ambushed. This is when something happens that brings back memories.

I follow a blog called Spitalfields Life about a community in the east end of London, England. On December 22, 2015, the content was a photo essay about a homeless shelter in the late seventies republished to raise awareness for a charity called Crisis.

Care and compassion radiated from the grainy black and white photos. I was ambushed by the photo that showed a guest having his feet cared for. I was reduced to tears. It brought back a time, twenty-five years ago and long forgotten, when a stranger knocked on our door asking for money. He did not look well, and my wife invited him in. He hobbled to a chair, and whilst I went off to make some tea, she made him take off his shoes and socks. I brought in the tea and some cookies, and was sent back for a bowl of water, some ointment, a towel, and a pair of clean socks. My beautiful, loving wife then carefully washed his feet and applied the ointment. Eventually, we drove him downtown and sent him on his way.

At that time, she was far more advanced in her faith than I. It is only now that I realize the biblical significance of what she had done and what I can learn from it.

John 13:14 – Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. (NIV)

Prayer: Dear Lord, we thank You for the surprises and ambushes that You daily send our way. Help us to recognize them and see them as opportunities to know You more fully, to love You more deeply, and to live our lives as You would want us to. Amen.

Fourteen years ago, my wife, Pauline Hitchcock, wrote a devotional around this text. We had travelled to Lunenburg, Nova Scotia, Canada, to see the burnt ruins of St. John's Church which had been destroyed at Halloween. We saw a shaft of light shining onto a broken stained glass window where the figure of Christ still remained, His arms outstretched in blessing. She wrote, "It was a message, clear and true. The building is gone; Christ is still with us."

Pauline recently passed away. We had an interlude during the Sunday service to celebrate her life. A dear friend, Linda, was among those who spoke. She had lost her husband, Ian, not long before in similar circumstances, and she remembered that he used to google the names of their children to see what would turn up so that he could tease them with it. She decided to google Pauline's name, and she found her devotional to share. Those words, "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age" were truly meant to come and comfort us both.

Linda and I decided that we would retrace Pauline's journey to Lunenburg. Again, it was a perfect, fall, Nova Scotia day. We found St. John's Church looking splendid in its "Carpenter Gothic", and the tenth anniversary of the complete restoration and rededication had just been celebrated.

How we talked. The Spirit was with us that day.

How wonderful it is that our Lord finds ways to help, love, and comfort us, bringing seemingly unconnected acts together into a coherent plan!

Prayer: Dear Lord, we thank You that, in the midst of our grieving, You are always with us, and that You have planned ways to send Your loving words to comfort us. Thank You that, in the light of Your love, we can go forward with confidence and know that You are with us and with those we love who are in Christ, until the end of time. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.