A number of years ago, I had what many would call a "nervous breakdown".

An entire generation of my family had died over the course of that year. My job as a family counsellor for a local mental health agency had gone from being merely stressful, to being emotionally and physically damaging. I had just been diagnosed with a progressive hearing loss. I had two young, demanding children. Excessive duties at my church felt as though they were crushing me.

I lost it. I quit my job. I quit my church. I came entirely too close to quitting my family by wanting to die and thinking seriously about how to accomplish that goal.

I cried out to God, much like the psalmist, with my anguish, my self-hatred and my accusation against God for not protecting me while I served him.

He heard me. Close friends from the church I'd left stayed in contact and prayed for me. God gave me a new church to attend. My husband kept me tethered to the joy of my family. A wonderful counsellor helped me understand what I was going through and what I needed to do to recover.

I made a promise to God when he gave me his Psalms as a comfort, that I would "fulfill my vows to the Lord in the presence of all his people" (Psalm 116:18), and so I write this devotional as a "thank-offering" (verse 17).

God is here for us when we need him the most. His scripture is like a healing blanket that soothes us and keeps us close to him. It's okay to cry out and wonder where God is and why it feels as if he has forsaken us. David did it all the time. God is here. God is with you.

Psalm 116:1-2 – I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live. (NIV)

Prayer: Precious, caring Father, hear our suffering. Hear our praise. Thank you for your love, and for your Son, and for your comforting and healing Spirit. In Christ's name. Amen.

Being a mother has been, I confess, one of the most frightening responsibilities I have ever been given. From the time I was told of each pregnancy, until now as I look at how they've grown nearly to adolescence, I have felt compelled at times just to stare at them in wonder. God has given my husband and me these wonderful gifts, whom we must nurture and guide into a future that sometimes does not look very welcoming.

I can't even imagine (even though I am trying to do so right now) what it would have been like for Mary to have an angel visit her with such extraordinary news. What enormous faith it must have taken to not only sing of her blessings, but to go forward into the incredible job of nurturing and guiding the "Son of the Most High" into adulthood!

Mary probably had no real idea what lay ahead for her son when God's message came to her. She could only know that her son was the gift, more powerful than even the angel who had frightened her half to death when he told her the news.

God knew what lay ahead, as He became an infant with the awesome power that had formed entire worlds somehow locked inside a tiny, fragile, human body. He was going to have to grow up, struggle with temptation, and experience the betrayal of close friends and the persecution of the leaders of his time. He was going to have to die on a cross, and then rise again and defeat the powers of death.

The season of Advent would have us reflecting on what it is like to wait for something wonderful to arrive. Advent would have us trying to feel, as they did so long ago, the uncertainty and struggle of wondering just how God would send his Messiah. Advent, in the 21st century, would have us to remember the knowledge of what God has done for us through his Son, Jesus.

Prayer: Dear God, help us to look at tiny babies and wonder at how you came to us in such a small body and ultimately gave us everything in yourself. Help the awe we feel strengthen us to serve you. In Christ's name. Amen.

I have been struggling with a condition called otosclerosis for the past five years. Slowly I have been losing my hearing as the bones in my middle ear become fixed in place and unable to vibrate. I've recently had surgery to replace one of those tiny bones.

The surgery took an hour; the recovery, longer.

I am crying as I write this because of the most beautiful things I can now hear. A week after the surgery, I lay in bed in what was normally silence, unable to fall asleep. Normally, I was stuck with the sound of my own breathing and pulse whooshing inside my head, only this time it was different. I held my breath to hear where this new sound was coming from.

"Oh…my…God!" I said, meaning every word of what often is said with no meaning. I could hear my husband's breathing! Such a quiet way to have recovery sneak up on me, and so precious! God is simply amazing!

I'm simultaneously humbled and joyous at how it is possible that I can have my hearing restored so fully, and know that many do not have such an option as corrective surgery.

What must it have been like to be standing in front of Jesus, and with only a touch or a word, to find oneself restored!

I can only glorify God for this wonderful gift to me, and hopefully bring you all along with me in praise!

Prayer: Oh…my…God…. You have touched us all with your healing hand, forgiven our sins and have given us faith in you. Keep us near you always and give us strength to serve you. And thank you, thank you so much! In Christ's name. Amen.

I know I'm not the only person who gets "road rage" — that incredible urge to yell at other drivers when they get in your way, pass too closely to your fender, take the parking spot you had your eye on, or, heaven forbid, box you in during a traffic jam when you're already late for work.

Our lives are full of these moments of tension, especially in this fast-paced world. We feel indignant at disruptions to our carefully laid-out plans. We hate inconveniences of any kind.

Sometimes I act like I am the centre of the universe, like those other drivers should know that I AM driving in their midst and should always have the right of way, or that I should never have to wait in line, or need to have a price check for one of my department store items.

Years ago, I read a stress management book that took a somewhat humorous approach to this obvious misplacement of myself in the grand scheme of things. There was a map of the universe drawn on one of the pages. An "X" marked a spot — waaaay off on one of the spiral arms — stating, "You are Here."

What a relief! — sort of. I'm more than happy to relinquish the spot. The author, however, seemed to have forgotten one very, very important fact.

God is the "centre" of our universe — the great I AM who formed it, who breathed it into being and who continues to keep the whole thing in motion according to — not our will — but God's.

Prayer: Most holy Creator, you have captured our hearts with your magnitude. Help us to trust you enough to remember our place in the universe with respect to you and to each other. In Christ's name. Amen.

My job requires me to be in contact with people who live and work all over the globe. The other day I spoke with a most amazing professional woman in Cote D'Ivoire (formerly known as the Ivory Coast).

She said a most heartbreaking thing to me about her homeland and the continent of Africa. The constant turmoil and devastation she has seen has begun to weigh heavily on her. She is becoming frightened. So am I.

We are both professional counsellors, trained in resolving conflicts between family members who are not getting along. Some of these conflicts have even turned violent.

We have such skills, training that we see as a calling of sorts, a way for us to use our talents to better the world around us as best we can. With a bit of co-operation, we can help warring families come to peace. Why can't we help warring tribes or countries?

It hurts to contemplate this kind of failure, the kind of failure that results in the deaths of thousands of people. How can we get these people to listen and understand what they are doing? How can we get them to stop?

The only solution I can come up with is to pray. God tells us to pray for our leaders. If there was ever a time when the leaders in our world needed prayer, it is now. As well, pray for those who are on the front lines of peace negotiations in these difficult situations.

Prayer: Dearest Lord, watch over those in countries torn by violence. Be with leaders who make daily decisions about life and death. Help them to choose life through you. Help us to do whatever we can to help. In Jesus' name. Amen.

I named my daughter Grace. It was the first thing that popped into my head when I saw her tiny, not yet fully formed face on the ultrasound monitor. It was truly an undeserved, unimaginable gift to be able to see my baby weeks before I was able to feel her bumping around inside me. I was in awe.

I find that reaction, that sense of amazement, monumentally dwarfed by what happens when I think for any real length of time about what God has done for us through Jesus.

That trembling, consuming, indescribable humility at contemplating God's vastness is reflected in the psalmist's declaration: "What is man that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou carest for him?" (Psalm 8:4 KJV) Sometimes I have to turn my thoughts away, or I think something in my head might burst from the magnitude of it all.

That God should bother to concern himself with us as fallen creatures, let alone incarnate himself as one of us in Jesus, is undeserved in and of itself. But to actually suffer and die, and then rise again, just so a bunch of conceited, power-hungry little human beings might be given a new, abundant, holy life?

Let it suffice to say that we should be glad that it somehow made sense to God to do such a wondrously compassionate thing. He has so much to teach us about forgiveness and grace. Praise be to our loving, holy God!

Prayer: Dearest God, we can't even come close to expressing enough thanks for what you have done for us. Help us to try anyway, relying on you for wisdom and strength. In your Son's holy name. Amen.

Just the other day, the six billionth person arrived on earth. The sweet baby was born in Sarajevo and was greeted by dignitaries from the United Nations. When I saw the picture and story in the paper, I couldn't help but be amazed.

How vast the population of our world is! How utterly varied are its billions and billions of people!

The whole event caused me a moment's panic, as well — a faith crisis, of sorts. Can God handle six billion people? I can't be the only person who struggles with a lack of faith regarding just my own life, just me, one person. But six billion?

Where can I go with my anxiety but to the Bible? Today's scripture gives a clear answer.

Yes!! Our God, who was able to put planets into orbit, can manage the contents of just one planet — and He'll do it according to His own design, as well.

As for me?

Psalm 139:1-3 – O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. (NIV)

Prayer: Help us, O Lord, to have faith in you, and in your vast wisdom and power. Help us to feel confident in your ability to be present in our individual daily lives, as well as in the lives of the so very many people throughout the world. In Jesus' name. Amen.