Sometimes I Cry

by
Listen to this devotional:
 Listen while you read: "Who Is He In Yonder Stall"1  (Lyrics)

I love Southern Gospel music, even if that makes me "un-cool"! I like its folksy, real-life lyrics, and I could almost dance to the joyful tunes. Actually, I am almost sure that King David danced to Southern Gospel music!

Today, I am reminded of a beautiful song sung by Jason Crabb called "Sometimes I Cry". The song tells how even in a life dedicated to God, we find ourselves lonely and hurt.

Sometimes in our attempt to protect the reputation of God — as if it needs being protected — we smile and don't let people know that we also experience the pain of this world. When asked, "How are you?" we smile and tell everyone that we are fine, when maybe our world is falling apart. Maybe we have had a dry season spiritually and have become so thirsty that our tongues are parched. We actually long for someone to dip their finger into the cool water of Christ's grace and touch it to our tongues, but yet, we stand tall, not wanting anyone to know our weaknesses or our struggles. After all, we reason, they might get the idea that God hasn't met my needs or maybe they might see my imperfection and wonder what kind of God I serve. Then, as the song goes:

    But sometimes I hurt and sometimes I cry
    Sometimes I can't get it right
    No matter how hard I seem to try
    Sometimes I fall down
    Stumble over my own disguise
    I try to look strong
    As the whole world looks on
    But sometimes alone I cry.

I know for myself, whenever I share with anyone about my chronic depression, I go away feeling like I might have let God down somehow. Shouldn't Christians always be happy and cheerful? What will they think of my faith when I share that there are days when it is hard just to get out of bed? Some days, I am a mess! There are times when my prayers seem to go no higher than my head and even precious words from the Bible ring hollow. There are times when I fall down and ask "Why?" and question almighty God. How many will sign up for this Christian life, when I look like a human being suffering all the same things as everyone else?

It is at times like these that our hearts need to cheer with joy, as my heart does, at the knowledge that Jesus knows what we are going through, and does not expect our Christian testimony always to be absolutely perfect!

Hebrews 4:15-16 – This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses since he had the same temptations we do, though he never once gave way to them and sinned. So let us come boldly to the very throne of God and stay there to receive his mercy and to find grace to help us in our times of need. (TLB)

Prayer: O Lord, give us Your joy to cheer our hearts amid the down times of life. Amen.

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About the author:

Jeanie Nihiser <jnihiserj@gmail.com>
Geneseo, New York, USA
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1 thought on “Sometimes I Cry”

  1. Thank you, Jeannie!

    How beautiful. Thank you so much for this.

    Thank you for a touching and sincere message.

    Thank you for today’s devotional. I needed this.

    Thanks for your truthful words of encouragement.

    Yep, we often leave out that part. Super devotion.

    Thank you for sharing this. I too have chronic depression and it’s always good to know that I am not alone.
    Bless you.

    Amen, Jeanie! Thanks for sharing this encouraging devotional with us.
    Amazing how God always gives us just the word we need at that moment.
    Blessings.

    Wow! Thanks for being brave enough to share your feelings today! I can so relate. I had a feeling as I was reading this that I would see your name when I got to the end. May God be with you and bless you!

    Thank you for your strong, vulnerable, and honest message. I can identify with this and truly appreciated this message this morning. May God continue to hold us up and make us bright lights for others to carry on as well. Thank you! God Bless.

    Hi Jeanie,
    Thank you for your personal honesty and taking the opportunity – at the right time – to share it with your PresbyCan friends in Jesus. You touched my heart and soul while giving me the courage to stand tall for Him.
    God bless.

    Jeanie, thank you for sharing your experience. Although I don’t share your affliction, I have suffered from long ongoing pain so I think I can appreciate what you go through.
    By sharing my faith in the Lord it has helped may others to never give up.
    May your story help others to never give up.
    Your friend in Jesus.

    Thank you, Jeanie, for your devotional today. Yes, there are times when we question what God has in mind for us especially when we are burdened with some uncomfortable situation or happening. However we must remain faithful and have trust as we continue to pray that the situation will be resolved in a way for us to handle, knowing the Lord’s helping hand is over us.
    Blessings for writing and may our loving Lord’s strength be with you.

    Good morning, Jeanie!
    Jeanie, I don’t know you – but I love you. You made me cry today because of your touching devotional. It was truly beautiful. Today, I was feeling a little sorry for myself and now after listening and reading your message I feel a whole lot better. It’s okay to cry a little and I too love the deepness of Gospel music. Thank you.
    Sending you positive thoughts and prayers!

    Hi Jeanie
    I’m sorry to read about your depression. As a pastor, I have heard many times of similar illness that Christians suffer from. You are right that the biggest difference is that followers of Christ have a strong support: one who promises to never leave us, is there with us … in good times as well as bad.
    Blessings,
    (BC, Canada)

    Excellent message with many good points to ponder. Thank you for sharing them. I am not, unfortunately, from the south, although I do live at the southern side of Ontario, Canada where I can look across Lake Ontario or the St. Lawrence River into the USA, so I am not familiar with those wonderful southern gospel songs except for the ones I have heard over the years. Would you please let me know the title of the one you quoted from. I would like to share it with our church’s director of music in hopes of using it.
    Thanks for your kindness and great messages.

    Dear Jeanie
    Have you been living in my mind for a little while????
    Wow, thank you for sharing this!
    It is like being in a spiritual rut, thank goodness through the grace of God it is a long and deep rut.
    Strange thing is ….at times when I look at the world situation and cry as I ask, why do they not want you Jesus? I cry as if somehow, I feel His grief. He is in control I know but Jesus cried.
    Thank you again.
    God bless.

    Good morning, Jeanie,
    I can relate to your message. I am very emotional and cry easily even though I am not overwhelmed by it. It is who I am as a person. I cry at happy and sad times. I like the title of your devotional because it describes me so well. I have never related my tears to someone doubting my faith. I hope my faith shines through my tears.
    I am sure that chronic depression is not easy to live with and I am sure that your faith helps you to manage the days. I think that honest sharing is part of our faith, and it helps others to accept what they are going through. No one is perfect. We all have flaws that God gave us for a reason. Sharing them and how our faith helps us is part of our journey.
    Thanks for sharing how you feel and keep dancing. Blessings.

    Thank you so much Jeanie for writing what I sometimes go through.
    God bless you deeply,
    (Canada)

    Aging involves loss – of health, much loved family, and friends. Music uplifts my soul and brings good memories and healing. I play on the piano hymns of praise and assurance.

    Thank you, Jeanie, for this comforting message. You would like what my church does in the winter. Because we’re a snowbird destination, we invite gospel music groups to sing at our church every week in Jan./Feb. 300-400 people fill our auditorium each week.

    Hi Jeanie,
    I wish we lived closer because I think I would enjoy knowing you better.
    Thank you for your devotional and your thoughts about your mental health. I fear I think I am so “healthy” that I forget how to empathize with others. That probably means I am not very sensitive to those around me.
    Every time you write I receive something worth remembering.

    Dear Jeanie,
    I enjoyed reading your devotional today. I know exactly what you are talking about. I was diagnosed in many years ago with Fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome. Since then other health issues, including depression at times have plagued me. I often wonder how others see my Christian walk.
    I have been told by some folks on Facebook that I give them hope and always positive vibes through what I put on Facebook. I often feel like Job or King David, struggling but hanging onto my belief. God is so good in so many areas of my life and has never let me down, I will continue to praise His wonderful name.
    I hope today is a good day for you. Blessings.

    Dear Jeanie:
    Thank you for your heartfelt testimony!
    Your daily cross may be painful, but your faith in our Lord is even more bright for that very reason. And you glorify our God by sharing your burden and your faith, because in the end you teach everyone to put all our trust in Him.
    I’ll be praying for you.

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